Dear Uncle Trey Pound:
My girlfriend and I have been having the same argument for months now. We live together, and I’ve been hanging out with her roommate lately. Nothing has happened (and it won’t) between me and the roommate, but my girlfriend is the jealous sort and she’s really bothered by our friendship. I’ve tried to explain to her that it’s just a friendship, but it’s falling on deaf ears. What’s worse, I can’t tell her the real reason I get along so well with her roommate: it’s because my girlfriend is kind of a pill. She’s very negative, and whenever anyone complains, she always has to one-up them. If I complain that my feet hurt, she mentions having hers amputated. I guess she’s always been like that, but it’s really starting to get to me now. How can I get her to change Uncle Trey Pound?
Signed,
Stressed-out Boyfriend
Dear Stressed:
Are you really writing for help, or do you want me to tell you what you already know: that you don’t want to be in this relationship anymore? If you’re looking for a reason to break up, I’m sure the ones you’ve mentioned (jealousy, negativity) are good ones. But if you’re looking to make things work with her, you already know your friendship with her roommate is going to have to end. Or at the very least, you’re going to have to cut back on the amount of time you spend with her for the sake of your relationship. As for your girlfriend, there could be a few reasons she’s such a downer. It could be that she’s had a rough life, or maybe she’s clinically depressed. Either way it’s not going to be easy, but you’ve got to talk to her. She’s not going to read your mind and pick up on your unhappiness, so be honest with her.
