Tuesday, June 22, 2010

New "Ask Uncle Trey Pound" questions!

Dear Uncle Trey Pound:

My good friend has a habit that is none-too-endearing. She has the habit of, while talking to someone, pulling out her phone and sending or responding to texts. I get that some things can’t wait, but I’m getting really tired of talking to the top of her head all the time. How can I remind her that I’m standing right in front of her?

Signed,

Put On Hold

Dear On-Hold:

Increases in technology (as well as our dependence on it) mean that more and more people are showing an appalling lack of manners when it comes to social interactions. While it seems impossible to change how everyone with a cell phone behaves, you can at least offer your friend some clues that she’s being rude. Chances are she’s not even aware of how her actions are coming across. I’d suggest a casual approach: when she whips out her phone to check her texts, try sending her a text that reads, “top of ur head is nice, but id rather c ur face.” That should get her attention… at least until the next text comes through on her phone.

Dear Uncle Trey Pound:

A friend of mine recently came out to his parents. Unfortunately they didn’t react quite as well as he’d have liked. They basically cut him off and refuse to speak to him or even say his name. While he’s glad to no longer be “living a lie,” he’s heart-broken that two of the most important people in his life won’t speak to him. I’m trying to be a supportive friend, but I have no idea of what to tell him. A little help here, Uncle Trey Pound?

Signed,

Straight Ally

Dear Ally:

Tell your friend that there’s good news: he’s already done the hard part by coming out. That first baby-step out of the closet can be the most difficult one to take. So he should be proud of himself for being honest with himself and with the world. As for your friend’s parents, try looking at things from their point of view for a moment. Even if they had some clue as to your boy’s true orientation, they still have to deal with a hard truth. They no longer have the luxury of ignorance and denial. Now that they know their idea of their little boy isn’t an accurate one, they have to sort of mourn it. They’re going to have to let go of their preconceived ideas of who their son will be and what his life will look like. And the hard truth is that they may never get to that point. There may never come a time when they embrace their son openly and without reservation. But tell him not to let that stop him. While it might be hard to believe, there’s a whole world out there waiting to accept him for who he is. And you’re being a good friend to him. Good luck to the both of you.

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